This is a shortlist of things I observed at the after party for the MTV VMAs. Having never been before, I was new to the experience all around. I felt a little bit old in a way because I stopped listening to/watching MTV years ago and with few exceptions, don’t pay much attention to the current music scene. But this couldn’t mask my excitement. I owed it to my 11 year old self who was a pop princess devotee. I find in my life when I agree to go somewhere or do something, it isn’t always just to satisfy myself at this stage in the game. It’s for the younger version of me. Lil’ Heather.
Also it was for my new internship which was a pretty sweet kick-start perk to starting off with. So I strapped myself into a sexy dress that was 2 sizes too small for me, lots o’ makeup, grabbed my roommate, and we were on our way.
Here’s a list of personal observances I made while I was there for the 4+ hours.
-The sheer amount of bone rail thin girls surrounding me was startling. Many of which looked like the last time they had a solid meal was probably in 2008. Maybe not even then. They looked bored. They were all very pretty. But man were there some vacant eyes up in the joint.
-It took awhile to coax people to the dancefloor. Like a couple of hours awhile. In some ways it reminded me of a high school dance where everyone is afraid to make the first move. Luckily the free drinks made everyone pretty loosey goosey and before you knew it, that damn thing was packed.
-Celebrities don’t dance with everyone else. They sit in their reserved couch seating and hang out with their own kind. And if you are very lucky, you might get to talk to them. Some are down to earth enough to wander the room but the majority stay put in their own zone. Also don’t look at them too closely. They see yo’ eyeballs, you guyz.
-Nobody was obnoxious or assholic. You know what I’m talking about. The crazy screeching fanboy shouting, “ZOMG, Kelly Rowland! I like, love, love, love you! You are fabulous, werk it sista, werk! Can I get your autograph? Can I have your numba? Can I have it? The back of your head is ridiculous!” Not even the gays were behaving over the top last night, a sign of what kind of night it was. There were security guards sure, but everyone was mellow at this party because most of them work in the industry. A certain amount of professionalism is required and those without it aren’t on the guest list for a reason.
-And yes, I did see some guys attempting to get in though they weren’t on the list. The girl at one of the tables told a set in front of me, “Look. Just because you know someone who knows someone doesn’t mean you’re getting in.” Hot. Damn. Mama.
-The above picture is exactly the outfit Katy Perry wore. In real life, she is extremely pretty and always seems to be laughing or smiling about something or the other.
-She also drinks Heineken.
-At one point I was within 5 feet of Britney Spears. 11 year old Heather was thrilled.
-Alas, I wasn’t allowed to talk to her, even for interviewing purposes.
-Every celebrity ever in thinner and in some cases smaller in reality. Especially Emma Roberts. God that one gave off bitchy vibes like none other.
-There was no end to the Eurotrash dudes strutting the room.
-Malin Akermann is quite possibly the nicest and most down to earth celebrity ever. I got a picture taken with her. This thrilled my inner nerd to pieces because she was in Watchmen and I had spent a good chunk of 2009 obsessed with that movie and graphic novel.
-LA girls do not get compliments. I told three girls their dresses were really cute. Three very different girls and I swear their faces exploded with happiness. Despite their obvious beauty, these girls are all stacking up against one another and it’s a very obvious war that doesn’t include compliments unless they’re of the insincere kind. This made me especially sad inside and very reflective for a moment.
-Then I went back to dancing and drinking. End of reflection.